Seeking Answers – A New Teacher

To new beginnings again and to change of seasons, to learning to let go and to finding new reasons, of happiness and to everything that is, to being alive. 

This is the “Story Of Me” that I wrote exactly 3 years ago, on 3rd June 2015, when I embarked upon a new journey. And today, when I went back to these words, it seemed right to post them here –

Confused I started the day it all began,
questions and doubts in my mind, they ran.
A long journey it was- by car, plane and bus,  
the idea was to sweat and learn,
to become aware of my fears, for the better I would yearn.

to know the little ones, bending on knee
let go of the inhibitions and free I be.

There the mighty FLAME* stood, how huge it was,                                              
made me think if it had any flaws.
I entered and looked and wondered,
thousands of thoughts in my mind thundered.
Tired I looked because I had come a long way,
step by step, I walked that ray.

For the opening ceremony, I liked to preen,
Ate in the hostel mess sometimes, weird cuisine.
Waking up early became a daily routine,
made a few friends and we laughed in between.
Seems like just yesterday, that Thursday,
the day of meeting them, from 7 to 12 pm, came.

It went on and they became more curious,
accustomed as I was, sometimes turned furious.
And there it flew, Friday, Saturday and Sunday,
the end of this institute and school would come soon,
I thought, one day.
On Sundays happy I became,
would still not rest but all game.

After school, sleep I would seek
the chances were obviously very bleak.
Sessions were burly, which often made me surly.
So much at me was suddenly hurled,
Bundle of information made me swirled.
Expectations there were much,
But I had some support system to clutch.

The Big Boss house it was initially called,
tough times made me appalled.
Day by day, even a bit, I improved,
TFI* day it was when we all grooved.
It all went on once more then next day,
nervous I would become, it was Monday.

Beliefs I have, for more opportunities I crave,
“Have a lot to do”, I say to myself before I reach my grave.
I am grateful to all, for all the help I got
for my path is paved, stop I will not.
Habits that I knew I would mend,
would take me time, to learn and bend.
There stood the apprehensions and my limits on that long wall,
I knew mistakes that I made, many I will further make, I will have a huge fall.

Yet I go and will keep on going,
reminding myself of the reason I’m ploughing.
The path is narrow and it is long,
that place still is unknown.
In the midst of asking myself where I belong,
I hope I get the answers along.

 

Terms-

1. FLAME: It is a University in Pune, where we had our Teachers’ Training for over a month. 
2. TFI: Teach For India.

One thought on “Seeking Answers – A New Teacher”

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